Not above the bribery...

As we head into the full swing of fall, it’s a bit bittersweet remembering how the beginning of summer felt. And while we cannot take the pool days, beach visits, and bike rides until dusk with us through the rest of the year, I can share with you one thing that worked with our kiddos this summer and that we still use…and I must warn you, it’s totally parent related, not fun at all, and feels a little like bribery.  But with a 10, 8 and 6-year old, sometimes you just cling onto anything that makes your life easier like a life raft of sanity. 
 
So here goes…I made and implemented a system for electronic time using tickets.  Now, I realize I am not genius, I surely am not the first parent that has done such a thing, and no one will be comparing me to Einstein any time soon.  I am ok with that; I am still over here reveling in the glory that it actually worked and continues to work. And that is what I am sharing today; a system that works for my kids, that I am thrilled sets its own boundaries, and sometimes gets them to give me an extra hand with all the extra things around the house (you know, those things they think a magical fairy does, like clean the toilet). 
 
If you too struggle with setting boundaries with electronics, having your kids hound you begging to use it, and a general lack of compliance with chores then hang in there…this may work for you too. I’ll lay out what we do below and you can tweak it to what works for you, because no two families are alike and certainly that goes for kiddos too.
 

1. Earning Electronic Tickets
   1. Electronic Tickets are handed out by Mom or Dad by doing any of the following:
      1. An extra assignment…math worksheet, Mad Libs, extra book of Mom or Dad’s choosing,               writing assignment
      2. An Extra Chore (cleaning, mowing the lawn, dishes, laundry, etc
      3. Tickets are not taken away for any kind of less-than-stellar behavior; once they are earned they are earned. This part is really important for us because otherwise our kids have a ‘why bother’ mentality. 
2. General Rules
   1. Mom and Dad get to decide how much that activity is worth in electronic minutes…No Questions Asked…this is an extra bonus, not a negotiation or parental hostage situation
   2. Generally we stick to a minute for minute rule; however if a 10 minute math worksheet takes them 30 minutes, they still only receive 10 minutes…because let’s face it, it’s up to them to complete it in a timely manner and they are technically working as an independent contractor…they get paid for the work they do
3. Redeeming Electronic Tickets
   1. The kiddos ask to use their ticket…if their behavior is not appropriate, we don’t have time because they are heading out the door, or their attitude isn’t right, they don’t get to use it…period. We do let them know and remind them how to redeem them and when they may ask again.
      
   2. We have a kiddo who is a time tracker…so in order to make sure he knows we are playing fair as well, we write the time he starts using an electronic device on the back and give him a 5-minute warning before the time is up.  You could also use a timer if that’s your jam. 

 
I get that this system isn’t for everyone, I also get that it may appear that we are control freaks and super old-school.  I am completely fine with all those opinions.  The fact of the matter is that one of our kiddos has issues with electronic usage and allowing the random use of electronics can create a lot of chaos…think rainbows and sunshine to hell in a hand basket in 3 seconds flat. But, the beauty about this system is that you can use it for whatever fits…extra allowance, monetary rewards, prizes, a special outing, whatever incentives your kiddos respond to best.  

​And the beauty of it? It teaches good work ethic, a better mentality about where and when to spend…I mean, I have to show up and actually work to get paid…and then I have to choose carefully about where I spend that money. These are all things we want our kiddos to do to grow up and be an employee someone would be willing to hire.  I’ll consider that last one a bonus because I genuinely look forward to the day when I can see them adulting and doing it the way that makes any mama or papa proud. So we’ll start here because baby steps always count.

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Stay...In The Moment